is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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