Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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