Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
