I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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