Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
