just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
