Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
