That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize