Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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