I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize