she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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