So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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