you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize