If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
the gays at disneyland are vicious
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
