they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
