So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Are these your boobs on my camera?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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