he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Randomize
