No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
