What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
