i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
