PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
