i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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