He is such a slut. More and more my type.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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