She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
The struggles of a small town man whore
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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