Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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