im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
