This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
