I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
