i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
