so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize