Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Randomize
