and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
