i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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