Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize