Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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