Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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