WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Randomize
