im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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