doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
