Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
