Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
All I want is dick and wine.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
