? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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