If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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