weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize