And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
