so that wasnt chicken after all
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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