In the future we'll all be gay
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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