we should wear snuggies to the strip club
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Randomize
