It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
