He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
