I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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