i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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